Couch Potato: Auburn visits LSU; Tennessee faces UF - Toledo News Now, News, Weather, Sports, Toledo, OH

Couch Potato: Auburn-LSU, UT at Florida fairly interesting; Troy hopes to heat Mullen's seat

Will Muschamp strides the sidelines searching for answers to the challenges posed by the interlopers from the land of the Volunteer. (Source: UF Communications) Will Muschamp strides the sidelines searching for answers to the challenges posed by the interlopers from the land of the Volunteer. (Source: UF Communications)
Auburn players celebrate with great exuberance after last week's comeback win over Mississippi State. (Source: Todd Van Emst) Auburn players celebrate with great exuberance after last week's comeback win over Mississippi State. (Source: Todd Van Emst)
LSU's much improved QB Zach Mettenberger will attempt to exploit Auburn's defense, which has been vulnerable to the pass this year. (Source: WAFB) LSU's much improved QB Zach Mettenberger will attempt to exploit Auburn's defense, which has been vulnerable to the pass this year. (Source: WAFB)
  • AlabamaMore>>

  • Saban on how he handles the politics and football conversation

    Saban on how he handles the politics and football conversation

    Monday, September 25 2017 4:18 PM EDT2017-09-25 20:18:38 GMT

    "But to me, some of the things we do in our country, I grew up, they were unifying events and it’s a little painful to see that those things are not so right now. But I also respect everyone’s right not to be censored in terms of the way they express their beliefs."

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    "But to me, some of the things we do in our country, I grew up, they were unifying events and it’s a little painful to see that those things are not so right now. But I also respect everyone’s right not to be censored in terms of the way they express their beliefs."

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  • Sports

    No. 1 Alabama shuts out Vanderbilt

    No. 1 Alabama shuts out Vanderbilt

    Saturday, September 23 2017 6:53 PM EDT2017-09-23 22:53:00 GMT

    Alabama hits the road for their first SEC match-up of the year. Keep up with the Crimson Tides clash with the Vanderbilt Commodores up in Nashville here.

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    Alabama hits the road for their first SEC match-up of the year. Keep up with the Crimson Tides clash with the Vanderbilt Commodores up in Nashville here.

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  • Alabama finalizes 2018 football schedule

    Alabama finalizes 2018 football schedule

    Tuesday, September 19 2017 4:49 PM EDT2017-09-19 20:49:44 GMT
    Source: WBRCSource: WBRC

    Officials at the University of Alabama finalized the 2018 football schedule on Tuesday. As usual, there are seven home games scheduled for Bryant-Denny Stadium with one neutral site game and four SEC road games.

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    Officials at the University of Alabama finalized the 2018 football schedule on Tuesday. As usual, there are seven home games scheduled for Bryant-Denny Stadium with one neutral site game and four SEC road games.

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  • LSUMore>>

  • LSU football enjoys team outing at original T.J. Ribs restaurant

    LSU football enjoys team outing at original T.J. Ribs restaurant

    Tuesday, August 11 2015 9:37 PM EDT2015-08-12 01:37:12 GMT
    Tuesday, August 11 2015 10:06 PM EDT2015-08-12 02:06:19 GMT
    The LSU football team took a break from the sweaty grind of fall camp Tuesday night to enjoy some team bonding and great food.More >>
    The LSU football team took a break from the sweaty grind of fall camp Tuesday night to enjoy some team bonding and great food.More >>
  • LSU football wants return to 2011 defense

    LSU football wants return to 2011 defense

    Thursday, August 6 2015 3:15 PM EDT2015-08-06 19:15:51 GMT
    Thursday, August 6 2015 3:36 PM EDT2015-08-06 19:36:51 GMT
    LSU may have ranked No. 1 in the SEC defensively last season, but many fans and analysts agree that wasn’t an accurate reflection of how the team actually played. More >>
    LSU may have ranked No. 1 in the SEC defensively last season, but many fans and analysts agree that wasn’t an accurate reflection of how the team actually played. More >>
  • LSU football reports for fall camp, Miles says Bain was never reinstated

    LSU football reports for fall camp, Miles says Bain was never reinstated

    Wednesday, August 5 2015 12:06 PM EDT2015-08-05 16:06:42 GMT
    Wednesday, August 5 2015 4:52 PM EDT2015-08-05 20:52:04 GMT
    On a steamy and sweltering morning in south Louisiana, the LSU football team officially reported for the start of fall camp. The Tigers checking into the West Campus Apartments Wednesday morning, with their first practice set for Thursday. More >>
    On a steamy and sweltering morning in south Louisiana, the LSU football team officially reported for the start of fall camp. The Tigers checking into the West Campus Apartments Wednesday morning, with their first practice set for Thursday. More >>

(RNN) - As far as football on TV goes, Saturday provides a good window of opportunity to pressure-wash the driveway before the winter snows.

These games are so bad that Couch Potato could probably go ahead and predict the outcomes without offending insane, hyper-sensitive troll fans so that they throw flaming bags of weapons-grade plutonium on his front porch.

But we're going to quote Pulp Fiction anyway – at least the quotes we can repeat in semi-polite company. We refer, of course, to Quentin Tarantino's 1994 neo-noir, black humor crime thriller that has been often imitated but never equaled.

"I'm trying Ringo, I'm trying real hard to be the shepherd."

Tennessee at Florida

3:30 p.m. ET, CBS

Both teams recently deflated the SEC aura of invincibility: The Vols got Duck-stomped last week and Florida had infinity turnovers in a loss at Miami. The Gators have had two weeks to fine-tune their offense, so now they can execute all six plays. This may be UT coach Butch Jones' best shot at a signature win before Obama leaves office.

"Oh man, I shot Marvin in the face."

Arkansas at Rutgers

3:30 p.m. ET, ABC

This is a big game for Arkansas and Coach Bret Bielema, husband of shockingly gorgeous rage tweeter Jen Bielema. The Hogs have a chance to go 4-0 before beginning a relentless eight-game hell-march through the SEC. Rutgers has beaten Norfolk State and Eastern Michigan, which indicates precisely nothing. Their quarterback Gary Nova is questionable after taking a shot under the facemask early in the EMich game. Arkansas has roared past Louisiana-Lafayette, Samford and Southern Miss by accumulative scores of 89-38.

"Say ‘what' again."

Colo. State at Alabama

7 p.m. ESPN2

Colorado State head coach Jim McElwain was Alabama's offensive coordinator during the 2009 and 2011 national championship seasons; both years, the Crimson Tide ranked No. 1 in the nation in beating other teams and seventh in the SEC in offensive red-zone performance. Last year, the offense averaged 42.7 points per game and last week, it out-footballed Johnny Football, 49-42.

Next week, Bama plays Ole Miss, which is beginning to look suspiciously like a real football team.

"We should have shotguns for this kind of deal."

Auburn at LSU

7:45 p.m. ET, ESPN

Auburn's Nick Marshall did heroic stuff in last week's 24-20 comeback win over Mississippi State, leading an 88-yard, winning drive in about 90 seconds for the Tigers' first win over an SEC opponent since the War of 1812. He also caught a 36-yard pass to himself, which is not an easy thing to do. LSU looks like it might be really good, but the season-opening win over TCU grows less impressive as the Frogs do things like look miserable losing to Texas Tech.

If Gus Malzahn can deploy his genius to get some production out of the three-back rushing committee, LSU is vulnerable. If not, not. LSU plays Georgia next week, so there's that to think about.

"The miracle you witnessed. I witnessed a freak occurrence."

Troy at Miss. State

7:30 p.m. ET, FSN

These teams have played interesting games in previous meetings. A loss would be devastating for Dan Mullen's tenuous hold on authenticity. Troy QB Cory Robinson is more accurate than a lot of drone strikes – he completed a universe-record 30-of-33 passes in the season opener against UAB and is hitting about 75 percent of his passes. The Bulldogs got torched by Auburn's passing game last week. Defense is not a thing Troy does much.

"Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead."

The other ones: Vanderbilt travels to UMass as a 36-point favorite, really; North Texas is sacrificed into the yawning maw of the voracious Georgia Bulldog; SMU pays for Alabama's sins at Texas A&M; undefeated Missouri carries the SEC banner north to the lair of Big Ten weakling Indiana.

"And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers."

Copyright 2013 Raycom News Network. All rights reserved.

  • SEC FootballSEC CoverageMore>>

  • Mississippi State falls to Georgia 31-3

    Mississippi State falls to Georgia 31-3

    Saturday, September 23 2017 11:47 PM EDT2017-09-24 03:47:50 GMT
    UGA beats MSU 31-3, click on the video above for highlights. Copyright 2017 MSNewsNow. All rights reserved.More >>
    UGA beats MSU 31-3, click on the video above for highlights. Copyright 2017 MSNewsNow. All rights reserved.More >>
  • Gators rally, nip Cats 28-27

    Gators rally, nip Cats 28-27

    Saturday, September 23 2017 11:46 PM EDT2017-09-24 03:46:02 GMT
    (Source: WAVE 3 News)(Source: WAVE 3 News)
    LEXINGTON, Ky. (AP) - Freddie Swain caught a 5-yard touchdown pass from backup quarterback Luke Del Rio with 43 seconds remaining to cap No. 20 Florida's rally from a 13-point, fourth-quarter deficit that beat Kentucky 28-27 on Saturday night.      The Gators extended their winning streak over the Wildcats to 31 games, the nation's longest streak in FBS, and took early control of the Southeastern Conference's Eastern Division. And it required everything they had after t...More >>
    LEXINGTON, Ky. (AP) - Freddie Swain caught a 5-yard touchdown pass from backup quarterback Luke Del Rio with 43 seconds remaining to cap No. 20 Florida's rally from a 13-point, fourth-quarter deficit that beat Kentucky 28-27 on Saturday night.      The Gators extended their winning streak over the Wildcats to 31 games, the nation's longest streak in FBS, and took early control of the Southeastern Conference's Eastern Division. And it required everything they had after t...More >>
  • Kerryon Johnson: 5TDs in return, No. 15 Auburn throttles Missouri 51-14

    Kerryon Johnson: 5TDs in return, No. 15 Auburn throttles Missouri 51-14

    Saturday, September 23 2017 11:18 PM EDT2017-09-24 03:18:05 GMT
    (Source: Auburn Athletics)(Source: Auburn Athletics)

    Kerryon Johnson finished one rushing touchdown shy of Auburn's all-time record for a single game as the No. 15 Tigers didn't let up in it's 51-14 win over Missouri Saturday night.

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    Kerryon Johnson finished one rushing touchdown shy of Auburn's all-time record for a single game as the No. 15 Tigers didn't let up in it's 51-14 win over Missouri Saturday night.

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